Dumb Laws

December 18, 2006

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Alabama

It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a
vehicle.
It is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in
church.
Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.
It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you
have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.
You must have windshield wipers on your car.
Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.

Alaska

Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving
airplane.
It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a
moose.

Arizona

Hunting camels is prohibited.
There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a
cactus.
When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only
protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person
posseses.
You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less
than one missing tooth visible when smiling.

Arkansas

A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
Oral sex is considered to be sodomy.

California

Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a
tavern, school, or place of worship.
It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving
vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails,
sloths, and elephants.
Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than
2 inches without her consent.
It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.
It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her
boss.
One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1
o’clock.
Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a
street corner.
Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.

Colorado

Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday.
It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.

Connecticut

In order for a pickle to officially be considered a pickle, it
must bounce.
It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.
You may not educate dogs.

Delaware

It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is
carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.

Florida

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee
has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M.
on Thursdays.
It is considered an offense to shower naked.
You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or
chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
Oral sex is illegal.

Georgia

It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which
lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.
Signs are required to be written in English.
Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street
lamp.
One man may not be on another man’s back.
It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may
spit from a truck.

Hawaii

Coins are not allowed to be placed in one’s ears.

Idaho

Illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing
less than fifty pounds.
You may not fish on a camel’s back.
Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime.
If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the
occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his
lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.

Illinois

You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by
up to three years in state prison, for the crime of
"eavesdropping" on your own conversation.
Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s
dog.

Indiana

A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if
the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and
is under the age of 17.
It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.
Liquor stores may not sell milk.
No one may catch a fish with his bare hands.
Men are prohibited from standing in a bar.
You are not allowed to carry a cocktail from the bar to a table.
The waiter or waitress has to do it.
Drinks on the house are illegal.
It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public.
Within four hours of eating garlic, a person may not enter a
movie house, theater, or ride a public streetcar.
It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid’s ears.

Iowa

Kisses may last for no more than five minutes.
One-armed piano players must perform for free.
A man with a mustache may never kiss a woman in public.
It is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or
narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa
drug tax stamp.

Kansas

Rabbits may not be shot from motorboats.
No one may catch fish with his bare hands.
The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.
If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed
until the other has passed.

Kentucky

It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky.
It’s illegal to fish in the Ohio River in Kentucky without an
Indiana Fishing License.
All bees entering Kentucky shall be accompanied by certificates
of health, stating that the

apiary from which the bees came was free from contagious or
infectious disease.
By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she
"cannot hold onto the ground."

Louisiana

It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller
with a water pistol.
You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.

Maine

You may not step out of a plane in flight.
Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.

Maryland

It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies.
You may not curse inside the city limits.
You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you
can have a 25′ satellite dish.
Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.

Massachusetts

It’s illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building
not in a city unless there are 2 exits.
It’s illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before
May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been
painted a different color.
No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.

Michigan

A woman isn’t allowed to cut her own hair without her husband’s
permission.
It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got
hurt in your house.
You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of
Michigan.
Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun
as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
Smoking while in bed is illegal.

Minnesota

All men driving motorcycles must wear shirts.
Oral sex is prohibited.
Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.

Mississippi

Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate,
results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.
It is illegal for a male to be sexually aroused in public.
It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100
times in a single session.

Missouri

Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.
Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
Four women may not rent an apartment together.

Montana

It is a felony for a wife to open her husband’s mail.
It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a
chaperone.
Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.

Nebraska

If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested.
It is Illegal to go whale fishing.
Barbers are forbidden from eating onions between 7 A.M.
and 7 P.M.

Nevada

It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.
A man is forbidden from buying drinks for more than three people
other than himself at any one period during the day.

New Hampshire

You cannot sell the clothes you are wearing to pay off a
gambling debt.
If a person is caught raking the beaches, picking up litter,
hauling away trash, building a bench for the park, or many other
kind things without a permit, he/she may be fined $150 for
”maintaining the national forest without a permit”.

New Jersey

You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service
and full service only.
On a highway you can not park under a bridge.
It is against the law to "frown" at a police officer.
If you have been convicted of driving while intoxicated, you may
never again apply for personalized license plates.
It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals at the
local zoo.
Raw hamburger may not be sold.

New Mexico

State officials ordered 400 words of "sexually explicit
material" to be cut from Romeo and Juliet.
It’s forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.

New York

It is against the law to throw a ball at someone’s head for fun.
The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
A person may not walk around on Sundays with an ice cream cone
in his/her pocket.
While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold
his hands while looking toward the door.
Slippers are not to be worn after 10:00 P.M.
During a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk
backwards on the sidewalks.
You may not smoke within 100 feet of the entrance to a public
building.
Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used
as a business.
You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand
It is illegal for a father to call his son a "faggot" or "queer"
in an effort to curb "girlie behavior."

North Carolina

Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.
If a man and a woman who aren’t married go to a hotel/motel and
register themselves as married then, according to state law,
they are legally married.
All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with
double beds that are at least two feet apart. Making love in the
space between the beds is strictly forbidden.
It is illegal to have sex in a churchyard.
A marriage can be declared void if either of the two persons is
physically impotent.
Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
You may not ride a bicycle without having both your hands on the
handle bars.
It is against the law to rollerblade on a state highway.

North Dakota

Beer and pretzels can’t be served at the same time in any bar or
restaurant.
It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on.
It is legal to shoot an Indian on horseback, provided you are in
a covered wagon.

Ohio

It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
The Ohio driver’s education manual states that you must honk the
horn whenever you pass another car.
Breast feeding is not allowed in public.
It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
Owners of tigers must notify authorities within one hour if the
tiger escapes.
No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July.
It’s illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.
Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was
fined for removing an item from a tree lawn even though he had
the owner’s permission.
You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.
It is against the law to roller skate without notifying the
police.
A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.
Throwing a snake at anyone is illegal.
Riding on the roof of a taxi cab is not allowed.
You may not run out of gas.

Oklahoma

Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces
at a dog.
Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to
congregate in groups of three or more on private property.
Anyone arrested for soliciting a hooker must have their name and
picture shown on television.
It’s statutory rape for a man over 18 to have sex with a female
under the age of 18, provided she’s a virgin. If she’s not a
virgin, it is okay, but the said person must be over 16. If
both parties are under 18, then the law does not apply.
Tattoos are banned.
It is illegal to wear your boots to bed.
It is illegal to have sex before you are married.
Fish may not be contained in fishbowls while on a public bus.
Tissues are not to be found in the back of one’s car.
If you wear New York Jets clothing, you may be put in jail.
Molesting an automobile is illegal.
Women may not gamble in the nude, in lingerie, or while wearing
a towel.

Oregon

It is illegal to whisper "dirty" things in your lover’s ear
during sex.
It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke
it on your own property.
You may not pump your own gas in service stations.
Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing.
It’s against the law for a wedding ceremony to be performed at a
skating rink.
People may not whistle underwater.
Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before
delivering a sermon.
One may not box with a kangaroo.
It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city
limits.
No more than two people may share a single drink.

Pennsylvania

It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together
because that constitutes a brothel. However up to 120 men can
live together, without breaking the law.
You may not sing in the bathtub.
Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania
residents.
Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either
the bride or groom is drunk.
Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays.
You may not catch a fish with your hands.
You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth.
Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish.
Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own
land, but a hunting license is required to hunt on your own
land.
All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.
No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.

Rhode Island

Professional sports, except ice polo and hockey, must obtain a
license to play games on Sunday.
It is considered an offense to throw pickle juice on a trolley.
You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same
customer on a Sunday.

South Carolina

It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while
attempting suicide.
It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps
on Sundays.
It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.
It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless
you own a private club.
Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the
marriage must take place.

South Dakota

It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or
treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you
may shoot them.

Tennessee

You can’t shoot any game other than whales from a moving
automobile.
It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
"Crimes against nature" are prohibited.
Driving is not to be done while asleep.
The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.
It is legal to gather and consume road kill
It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
It’s illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.

Texas

When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each
shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the
other has gone.
It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time
while standing.
You can be legally married by publickly introducing a person as
your husband or wife 3 times.
It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don’t need
a windshield, but you must have the wipers.
It is illegal to milk another person’s cow.

Utah

It is against the law to fish from horseback.
It is illegal not to drink milk.
It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them,
but you just can’t detonate them.
Birds have the right of way on all highways.
It’s legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if
you ask for the wine list.
It is considered an offense to hunt whales.
Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.

Vermont

Whistling underwater is illegal
At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole.
Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear
false teeth.

Virginia

You cannot sell lettuce on Sunday, but you can sell beer, wine
etc.
It is illegal to spit on sidewalk.
If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual
relations.
Driving while not wearing shoes is prohibited.
It is illegal to tickle women.

Washington

It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
It is illegal to pretend that one’s parents are rich.
When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the
other has passed.

West Virginia

It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it
does not exceed 40 lbs.

Doctors and dentists may not place a woman under anesthesia
unless a third person is present.

Road Kill may be taken home for supper.
Whistling underwater is prohibited.

Wisconsin

At one time, margarine was illegal.
While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese
making requires a master cheese maker’s license.
It is illegal to kiss on a train.
It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.

Wyoming

It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while
drinking.
You may not take a picture of a rabbit during the month of June.

Source

December 18, 2006 | Filed Under Politics

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